Give it to me Raw

Jenna

raw discouragement from friends and family

it's mainly my mom, who loves to cook (healthy vegan food at that) but i've been getting a lot of non-supportive feedback since going fully raw (today is day 12). i feel great and have been eating a lot, but my mom claims i'm "fasting" which is certainly not true (she says this after seeing me eat five ears of corn in front of her). luckily i'm not letting her constant negativity affect my decisions, but life would be much easier without her bickering. why do non-raw foodies feel the need to speak against this way of life? do they feel threatened? i have plenty to say about many peoples diets - my mom eats chicken, fish and turkey, and i have plenty to say on that alone. but i choose to keep my mouth shut, most of the time, except for when she starts up with how raw food is a cult movement. the second i start to list the negative impact on the environment and the body from meat eating, she goes off on me as if it's okay for her to criticize me but not okay for me to criticize her. some people are just too stuck in their ways.

end rant!

Tags: discouragement, struggles

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Gian Comment by Gian on August 24, 2009 at 1:05pm
Kim gave some great advice. Right on! There are always negative people in this world. We can't control other peoples' ideas. With that in mind, you should just focus on your diet and nevermind the naysayers. Don't try to change their diets and don't allow them to argue with you about your diet either. Just tell them that everyone has a different taste for foods and that it's ok to be different.
Well, Kim was totally right about keeping your ideas to yourself and sharing them only with positive people in your life. I threw out a lot of negative people in my life and it's a constant battle to keep them on the other side of the door.
Focus on changing your world. Life is too difficult to try and argue and change all the people. You can only effect change on those people who want to listen and understand. Otherwise, it's just a waste of time. Focus on yourself, share your great experiences with positive people.
alex anthony Comment by alex anthony on August 23, 2009 at 9:56pm
kim caldwell had the best advice and i agree. you'd be surprised the negative energy even beloved family members and friends harbor towards you. especially when something is very important to you, it sometimes makes a lot of sense to just let it happen rather than speaking on it before it does. not sure if there is a such a thing as retroactive negative energy.

good luck with things.
Jenna Comment by Jenna on August 23, 2009 at 6:46pm
thanks jennifer, very good and inspiring advice :)
Jennifer Comment by Jennifer on August 23, 2009 at 5:29pm
Believe in yourself, trust the impulse that took you to raw. Your belief and knowingness will grow, you are at the very start of your raw adventure. Support yourself through raw community and work on keeping your own vibration high. Mayb now is not the time for conversations with others, it serves no purpose if there is conflict . eventually you will become a teacher through the clarity of your example, people will ask you what you do to look so good, then is the time to talk about the raw lifestyle, when others are engaging with you on a positive level and you are fully aligned in your beliefs and actions.
Wishing you well, om shanti
Jessika Smith Comment by Jessika Smith on August 23, 2009 at 12:02pm
I feel you Jenna! I've only been raw for a few months and my dad has recently found out.. he noticed a change in my groceries, and it wasn't even a big change since I was vegan before. But now he says I have until next week to change what I eat or he is going to put me in the hospital.. =( But I have a tendency to stick to what I believe in so next week won't be pretty. I wish I had advice for you, sorry, I'm still trying to figure it out as well.

Best wishes!!
Phill Comment by Phill on August 23, 2009 at 4:49am
Hi Jenna.
It is a matter of perception. Talking on 'diets' leads to mental associations about strict/rigidness of views & discipline. If you were to be strict and discipline about your spiritual ideas for example and it happened to be something that alot of other people were practicing too, could it not be possible to view that as rather cultish? Specially if you dont know what kind of results one may be in for?

So if you could understand your moms love as being rather perscriptive in itself, you could perhaps relax your views & perceptions on others' way of eating, whether you choose to express them or not. Because if energy flows through relationships, regardless, and our perception of the world is a projection of who we are inside, then the paradox of having certian thoughts, is that others will reflect that back to you, and their actions wont be to be so respectful to keep their mouth shut about what theyre thinking. But see also its not a matter of respect either, because its that she respects you enough to make sure that you are looked after. Parents test our ability to have compassion for the world :)

Now for your emotional sake, it is important that you dont resist being looked after.

If there is perhaps one GEM in this post for you, its a perception based on 'conversations with god', its that you will have great peace inside if you just focus completely on yourself, being independant and self-sufficient.
Not: "I dont need anyone", but "i create myself in the highest state of happyness & am experiencing myself in this world for my enjoyment ONLY", regardless of whatever suffering you may perceive around you. (theres a paradox here)

Come into relationships not for what you can give to others, or teach others(because otherwise others will be constantly reflecting that back to you and they will hand you their judgements to deal with, lol), but to use it as a way of expression your highest state of being, how you want to create yourself in that relationship at the level of the material world; what kind of experiences do you choose? In your relationship with your mother, do you want to create yourself as an easy going lover of life? So then bring on a perception & then 'feeling sense' of love & selffurfillment for yourself first, spread that around your whole body, and to your mind, open your ears and listen, open your eyes and see the world. To be pained with blocking it out, is to struggle. To struggle is to resist a false sense of self which ultimatley is destined to fail. Dont struggle with others perceptions. Instead, create your own, and use conversation as a means to express your highest love for life. Laugh a little more about the sillyness of paradoxial manifestations. :P

So with that said, I have to remind non-raw fooders constantly that my number one suggestion about starting out on raw food, is not to buy into dogma (an unfounded beleif), and to trust their experience more than anything, and to alow for major flexability in eating even if it means that they bounce back to cooked food now and then, the pain pleasure principal will take over by which they will naturally feel that raw food is just so much better. This disarms anyone who is resistant to cults. Because its like 'welcome to a new view of food where there is more love in the food'.

So Ive been changing my views on food and have seen that i get different reactions & conversations take different paths, and im at the place now where i can see that most people have an emotional hunger that cant be solved by food alone. Raw food intensifis our energy and therefore our impact in a relationship. Alot of raw fooders may have trouble with dealing with this, so they block the world out too much and then it seems no matter what they do they cant feel good, and they swing back and forth between cooked food because nothing feels any different. If your neurology is not allowing for the proper function of your body then voila! It is then perhaps of critical importance to find other ways of expressing ourselves rather than resorting to struggling with the worlds ideas and sufferings.

May i recommend two books on perceptions & non judgement: 'conversations with god by neale donald walsch', and 'a course in miricles'. Get off the computer, walk down to a bookstore and ask the store clerk for these books. They will be more than happy to sell you some books, so feel free to ASK. Read them, and be empowered to change reality by changing yourself inside on levels you may not have realised you could change & to the depth in which it is possible to easily make changes.

Even if you dont agree with everything ive said, it doesnt matter by the way, i respect your views too. Dont listen to me or anyone unless it not only feels right, but that you can expect to get the same results as the other is already getting in their life. It is that perhaps that by reading the end of this that you will have already learnt what there was to learn unconsciously, just by shifting your focus onto the more pressing topics of life.
Keep in touch on this :)

Bless you infinitley. :)
-Phill
Charles Comment by Charles on August 23, 2009 at 12:53am
My mom still complains and it's been a couple years now. There's really no easy resolve to this other than to just suck it up.
svelte_in_la Comment by svelte_in_la on August 22, 2009 at 11:52pm
She'll quit complaining eventually.
Jenna Comment by Jenna on August 22, 2009 at 10:16pm
thanks kim. i actually haven't told anyone except my parents and my boyfriend because my mom would cook me food had i not told her. but i do agree with your advice :)
Kim Caldwell Comment by Kim Caldwell on August 22, 2009 at 9:36pm
One of my motto's is keep your goals to yourself until they come to fuition. This is becasue certain people will put their negative energy on it. Just the way it is. When I decided to write my book I told only a few selective very positive peeps. This works for everything.
blessings kim

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