If anyone has advice, I would greatly appreciate it... (threats)

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Comment by Jessika Smith on September 5, 2009 at 8:24pm

Thank you all for your help! All that I did was get some organic vegan canned beans and he hasn't said anything else about hospitals. I haven't mentioned anything else about raw, to avoid trouble. I will be old enough soon to where he can no longer do this.

Comment by Finnegan Kelley on August 24, 2009 at 1:54am

Read up on your rights, show him that his threats are ludicrous and mean gobshite. Parents usually make crap panicked and extreme decisions because they don't know how to deal with their worry. So show him; show him the literature - and not the religious crap - show him how intelligent you are, and what an effort you're making. Reassure him that you understand the motives of his reaction but let him know that it's ultimately your body and absolutely your decision what you put in it. Be firm, and meet any passive-aggressiveness with elitism; shrug him off if he starts making serious threats (cutting off food supply, becoming overly controlling of your diet), make him feel as if he's being ridiculous.

Once you get to the age where you can start making these decisions you have to assert yourself early, otherwise, you're fucked.

Also, show him this. Seriously, if he sees how ridiculous his reaction looks to other people and how much support your being given (especially the advice to seek legal action, to distance yourself from the relationship entirely)

I know what you're going through, I've done this with raw, with veganism, vegitarianism, ect.. It helps in my case that my most prominent characteristics at 13 were bitter, cynical, and manipulative; but there you go - got the job done each time to be one step ahead.

Comment by svelte_in_la on August 24, 2009 at 1:09am

I agree with Rob Hoover. Remember, they're parents. The key is to get them off your back.

Comment by Jenna on August 23, 2009 at 9:30pm

do what i'm doing, have your parents bring you in for bloodwork to prove you're not lacking in anything.

Comment by Rob Hoover on August 23, 2009 at 8:02pm

This guys obviously a little unbalanced if he threatens to put you into a hospital for your diet choices.
Since your a minor living under his household I recommend you use a little bit of diplomatic methods and work out some sort of compromise whereupon you agree to eat a small amount cooked food each week but for the most part remain high raw. Get this is writing and stick to it. This should difuse the situation for the time being and you can make plans when you are of age to get out on your own.
The world won't end if you eat some cooked and you'll have the rest of your adult life to eat whatever you want.

Comment by svelte_in_la on August 23, 2009 at 7:52pm

Show him the calorie/fat content in raw tahini or raw almond butter. That way he won't think you're anorexic.

Comment by Jessika Smith on August 23, 2009 at 6:59pm

Thank you so much everyone! I can't thank you enough! It helps so much just knowing that someone is there!

Lots of love!

Comment by Ryan V. on August 23, 2009 at 6:35pm

So the question is, are you unhealthy? If not, go get a medical checkup and let them examine you and show him the report. If they give you a perfect bill of health, what can he say?

Comment by Aric Strong on August 23, 2009 at 5:32pm

How old are you? If you are still in high-school you can still move out on your own. Its not easy, but I did it when I was 14. How does your mother feel about your lifestyle. I know that one of the reasons my family got quite venomous with me when I went vegan and then raw is because it seemed to them like a rejection of who they were as people.(Because I have a very food obsessed family!) If your father is going to force you to eat food that you believe is not good for you. That is abuse. It is wrong. If you are still dependent, you could always call social services from a pay phone and ask them for advice. Call up every authority you can think of and at least ask them what you can do. It might be against the law for him to do this to you. He doesn't have to buy raw food, but you are sovereign over your own body. You have basic human rights.

I can't believe that he could think you are unhealthy. You have a radiant complexion and hair and clear eyes.

Comment by jodykwik on August 23, 2009 at 2:45pm

great advice here already for you in what is a truly tough situation. my prayers and hopes are with you Jessika in being able to turn this problem to an answer. when i was growing up i had issues where my parents went into a form of strict control over me...but they weren't around food at that point in time. they would've been if i wanted to eat raw though. i think it's only possible to get through this sort of tension one day at a time. and like mish said, it probably will require making him think he's 'winning' on some level. and it will definitely require seeking out your higher self, the one who has already lived through this and turned into the person she really wants to be, and seeing all the details of how it happened since only you know all the specifics here. hospitals will only take you for ED issues. just the fact that you eat raw fruits and veggies isn't enough for admission. i'm wishing all the best for you my dear...8^)) rock on.

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