Getting back on after falling off...

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Permalink Reply by Luminea on December 27, 2007 at 1:39am

Wow, Dee, I can relate to a lot of what you said. I went 100% aw in August and even though I was on the high-fat raw diet mimicking old cooked faves I still noticed a major improvement in my health. I started to study the 80/10/10 diet in Nov and was feeling really good about implementing it, when the holiday season hit. I resisted cooked stuff at two parties but finally caved---and when I did it was amazing how the self control completely evaporated. :(

I know what you mean about feeling addicted--and it truly is funny to me that cooked yams (in my case) could be seen as a drug. It's not like I'm binging on sugar or alcohol. LOL.

I wonder, have you come across the book "12 Steps to Raw Foods" by Victoria Boutenko? It was recommended to me and I was reading it before the holiday busyness swept me away. She addresses the difficulty that many people have in becoming and staying 100% raw, and yes, she does walk you though a 12-step program for addictions, just like AA. One of the steps is about gaining support, and yes, having a sponsor to go to when you feel like you are going to fall off the wagon.

I have only got a few chapters in to the book, but I was amazed by a story Victoria told about volunteering with a group of cancer patients. All of them were put on a raw diet and many improved while some went completely into remission. However, when the holidays came around they ALL fell off the wagon and their symptoms returned. Victoria wrote about a young mother whose husband and 2 sons pleaded with her to stay raw, offered to help prepare the meals and eat the same food as her--but she couldn't give up her addiciton to cooked food. She eventually died, as did ALL the other patients.

I'm not telling you this to be a downer or make you feel like it's futile--it just was amazing to me the power of SAD and how addicting it really is.

Yet people like Dr. Doug Graham and others have been on 80/10/10 or something similar for 20+ years, so it CAN be done.

I don't think you're weak...you just need support. It would be great if you and I could stay 100% raw, even when our loved ones are eating SAD in front of us, and some day maybe we'll be that strong. But I know that most smokers go back to smoking as soon as they are around someone else who lights up. (I don't smoke, but my brother has been trying t quit for years.) So if you are able to go to potlucks or classes where you live maybe you can find some raw friends and even a partner to support you in how you eat.

Anyway, I hope this helps in some way. Hugs, Luminea

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Permalink Reply by Dee on December 27, 2007 at 2:07am

Thanks much! I haven't see that book but I will look for it. It was the raw pot luck that got me into trouble... lol (if I may place blame.) I thought I was safe. After beginning 80/10/10, I soon realized I had to avoid the pot lucks as well. I actually don't feel isolated or detached from society the way many 80/10/10 people have described their loneliness, so I am fortunate. I like being home, doing my own food... I don't think much about it, other than the cost, when I'm not around the other. In fact, it's quite easy, one of the easiest after I got over my hump.

I've pd a lot of attention to the anxiety during this time... wondering what the payoff is, what the fear is, etc. A lot of new challenges, relationship & work wise, overwhelm and so many directions to choose from. I think I've got some of it figured out and logical components help me tremendously then with the self-talk and self-love & acceptance and gentlenss around the emotional part that's expressing through the food... or attempting to with fresh, but it's not possible. I believe I've found a viable substitution and now it's a matter of repetition to create the neuro pathways to make it stick... reaching for food in effort to medicate is so easy. I'd love to do Dr. Doug's Fasting Retreat in Costa Rica and REALLY scare the be-geezus out of my anxiety! lol

I've never forgotten the reasons why... but I have found myself doing the wishful bargaining.. "I want to heal enough so I can have just a little cooked food that won't wreak havoc on my system." LOL.. like you said, like an alcoholic would likely just wish to be able to drink like a "normal" person!

I have glimpsed how I felt and how powerful 80/10/10 is... I feel on the edge of greatness... something major, I can't quite explain it and perhaps I fear it, the unknown... familiar (read that as family-liar) is easier than growing into and embracing power, often times. It means more responsibility, more stepping up to the plate, etc. Most has to do with relationship issues with men and yet I deeply know that simply means a disconnect in my relationship with Self. We are all but a mirror.

Thank you so much for sharing. I think I'm making a comeback! I am 2 days 100% raw 811 again. I've shared with my S.O. that if we are to connect, it must be around something other than food unless he's going raw too. It's just not worth it.

Be well!

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Permalink Reply by nycgrrl on May 31, 2008 at 9:18pm

I just want to say, I think it would be fun to use this group as a "support group" at times, what do you think?

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