What about being social with non-raw foodies...

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Permalink Reply by Julia on December 17, 2008 at 5:09am

Get used to ordering dressing-less salads and sipping water :-)

The first time it comes up, your friends might ask questions and such. But subsequent times it probably won't come up again. They'll be too absorbed in their own drinking to notice what you're doing

I would tell you to order plain cranberry juice, but we all know the bottled kind is no good :-(

Maybe if you carry around a little flask (full of fresh juice instead of alcohol!) they'll figure you're an alcoholic and won't let you order anything :-D

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Permalink Reply by Rebecca Lynn on December 17, 2008 at 8:08am

Julia...you're funny!

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Permalink Reply by Lorianne on December 17, 2008 at 3:58pm

You'd be surprised at the extent people will go to get you to drink or eat what they're eating. It seems they feel irresponsible or something if you're not doing what they're doing, or what they think is good.

Reminds me of the concept that it's considered an insult of you refuse food from another tribe or culture. - Probably the same dymanics.

I've told people I don't drink, that I don't want alcohol, that I'm happy with a big salad, no need to make chicken or fish, but they are so unhappy with that!

Lime water can look like anything, especially if fizzly, so it's a good way to deal with the social thing.

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Permalink Reply by Roch on December 17, 2008 at 3:22pm

Delis,

You don't sound very tolerant. They only share different opinions, like you do. Does your choice of diet allow you to be so judgmental?

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Permalink Reply by Frank on December 17, 2008 at 8:13am

Delis,

I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes I find what comes out of peoples mouths is more shocking than what goes in. I also have moments where I see how insane our society is. I know with family and people we’ve had long relationships with it’s difficult because of history and assorted baggage.

What I try to do, which takes a great deal of effort, is to keep in mind that at there core is purity. In each individual, deep inside is purity. It’s like light that is distorted by warped or dirty glass that prevents it from shining through. Regardless of how it is represented on the outside at it’s source it is pure.

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Permalink Reply by Frank on December 17, 2008 at 8:17am

...and if that doesn't work, grab em by their sickly little necks and choke 'em out. Either way is good.

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Permalink Reply by Kim Caldwell on December 22, 2008 at 6:45pm

OOO that is a good one FRANK kind of reminds me of JESUS.

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Permalink Reply by Frank on December 22, 2008 at 6:54pm

which part ? the "choke 'em out" part? JK. When LOVE fills me I turn into a fool. I think I learned that from Tolle.

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Permalink Reply by Rebecca Lynn on December 17, 2008 at 8:18am

I have been back and forth with this issue as well...in fact, I have been almost in isolation for the past 4 months! However, last weekend was a friends birthday and I felt that I should be there for her even though they were going out to a stinky smokey bar. I had awful feelings about it at first, but after a little while of hanging out and talking with my friends, I had a great time. I also still have a glass of red wine here and there, so that's what I did. I sipped on the same glass of red wine all night and I didn't even finish it. I relunctantly ordered a salad since I was getting hungry ( I didn't think this little ole bar would have anything decent) BUT to my surprise, this big beautiful salad came my way! I left at a decent hour and despite smelling of cigarette smoke, I was happy that I went. Everyone of my friends woke up with hangovers - but I woke up early and felt great that I was closer to balancing everything. I think next time, I'll either bring or order some sparkling water and sip on that all night. Maybe bring a kombucha or drink a cacao shake right before going out!

We don't want to stop living because our diet has changed. HOWEVER, we begin to change as we adopt this new lifestyle and we might find that we start to leave things behind...and that may include some friendships. It's just the way life goes...just take it day by day and only do what feels right at that time. It's easier said than done...but I am sure if we practice it a little each time, it will get easier to do as time goes on.

Good luck Jasmine!!

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Permalink Reply by Jasmine on December 17, 2008 at 12:31pm

Thank you. That's a good idea. I considered bringing kombucha. Good suggestions and insight.

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Permalink Reply by Kim Caldwell on December 22, 2008 at 9:38pm

Yea Rebeca Lynn sounds like a success.

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Permalink Reply by Nicole on December 17, 2008 at 9:08am

As difficult as it is I think it's important to do what's best for you despite what everyone else is doing. If your friends are true friends they will respect that and not pressure you into eating/drinking the way they do.

Surrounding yourself with like minded people can help relieve the social pressure. Instead of just contemplating joining a raw potluck or meet-up group actually do it! There are billions of people on this planet killing themselves with food and it's incredibly easy to let society tell you that what you're doing is fringe and you should just give up the struggle. Being around people like that all the time is going to make eating raw food and being mindful of your health difficult. Take a break from that environment every once in awhile if you can't do it permanently.

But the truth is there will always be people around you who eat cooked food and animal flesh and alcohol and you just have to learn to accept that and remember that the choices they make don't have to effect you. I go out with friends who eat cooked food regularly. Sometimes I order a salad when I'm out. Sometimes I don't order anything except water. In our society so much of "socializing" is really just eating and drinking. And if you feel you HAVE to have alcohol in order to be social then you should probably contact your local chapter of AA

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