Divorce?

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Permalink Reply by Suzie- Smoothie on February 13, 2009 at 3:48pm

Oh I am so sorry to hear about your painful news....it does nt help much what folks say to you when you ar e maybe going through this but people listening does??
I can only say to you time is the best healer and its the belief of what you would like your life to be like is the most important thing...have you read Esther & jerry Hicks..``Ask and you shall receive``?
We cannot make other folks happy if they are not happy already.....
Another good thing i heard about is to say to your self over and over ``EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT``..it so powerful..and to continue and say that the universe will provide me with what I want.....
I have never been married but my mother and father remarried each other 3 times!... (

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Permalink Reply by s on February 13, 2009 at 3:52pm

hi abigail,
i'm so sorry to hear about your situation. i don't have any advice to offer, but i am a great listener, and i wanted to respond to this to make you feel a little more supported. i wish you all the best. please feel free to pm me if you would just like to vent.
s

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Permalink Reply by Abigail on February 13, 2009 at 3:57pm

Thank you for your compassion, in the beginning i thought i was ok, it has only been 6 weeks and i am just now falling apart. Today is the first time i have gotten online and started talking to other people about it, it feels pretty good. Yes i have read that book, i didn't even think to refer to it, thank you. I jumped right into another relationship and i am wondering if it was a good idea, i love him and have been friends with him for years, but im not sure if he understands what is in store. Im not sure what to do. I have to kids too... they are 3 and 2, he loves them and does great with them, i just don't know how well i can heal feeling like i have to hold back some of my feelings.

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Permalink Reply by Susan Virginia on February 13, 2009 at 4:37pm

Wait, you said in the first post that you're sad he's moved on... but you've also moved on??? You're also seeing someone else? Why are you upset then?

And you left him, right? So why would you care what he's doing now?

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Permalink Reply by Abigail on February 13, 2009 at 3:58pm

thanks for the support. i appreciate it.

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Permalink Reply by Uti on February 13, 2009 at 4:13pm

Hi Abigail,
First thing I want to share is that you are not responsible for another person's happiness, so there was nothing you could do or should have done to make him happy, that's his job alone.

Don't let the thoughts of the past suck your energy, your focus is needed in the present with your children and daily life.

There's a natural grieving process at the end of a relationship, whether you're glad it's over or not, and that process just takes some time to heal.

The best news is ALL THIS TOO SHALL PASS. Reaching out to your friends gives you a bigger picture, that was a good move.

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Permalink Reply by Abigail on February 13, 2009 at 4:18pm

Thank you so much for all the wisdom, i forgot how wonderful this community of people are. I feel like i can't do the things i want in life while here in alaska, i keep feeling like i want to run away, i don't even know what i want out of life anymore. I feel so lost and hopeless.

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Permalink Reply by Abigail on February 13, 2009 at 4:28pm

thank you

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Permalink Reply by WhoRaw on February 13, 2009 at 4:26pm

Hang in there Abigail as someone else said This Too Shall Pass. There's a website called survivinginfidelity.com although this wasn't your situation. There are alot of people that are very supportive on that site. There is a forum there called New Beginings its totally awesome. check it out when you can.

take care

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Permalink Reply by Abigail on February 13, 2009 at 4:23pm

any time i start to feel a little hope for the future, a little bit of happiness, my stomach turns and my nerves go crazy and the sadness takes back over.

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Permalink Reply by Lisa on February 13, 2009 at 4:32pm

Abigail...I have great compassion for where you are right now. I have been through divorce twice with children involved and the last which was 51/2 years now was extreme due to child custody being given to the father and..my beliefs being brought into court etc. It will get better as one says this too shall pass is an excellent mantra. It seems it will never get better at the beginning but it will.....you have a world of possibilities for your life...releasing the attachment and focusing on giving to your needs and healing through this in whatever way you need to is the best ever...releasing your emotions is needed for your well being because it is part of letting go....just my thoughts toss what doesnt fit...

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Permalink Reply by Abigail on February 13, 2009 at 4:54pm

thank you so much, it is good to hear from someone that has been there....

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