F%$*#k

OK so I screwed up.
I got a friggin colonic.
And then, I drank a bunch of wine and ate way too much chocolate because I was depressed.
Last night I truly almost died. My boyfriend doesnt believe me cuz he thinks Im a hypochondriac. He wasnt there,
My throat was swollen, my heart rate was through the roof, muscle/facial spasms I felt nauseous, could hardly catch my breath.
I felt this way all morning until I drank coconut water. then I had a sweet potato. For dinner I had scallopps with marinara, and a raw salad. Then I ate a bunch of almonds, and some eggs (Phosphorus) . Now Im drinking pedialyte and smart water, but my throat is still a littl swollen and some minor muscle twitches.
WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW?!!!! Im hoping this stops. I am SOOOOO DOOONE with raw food diets. done with fasting, done with effing all of this crap. WAY DONE with nutritionsits telling me my cravings arent real. BULL!!! I Woke up dehydrated craving eggs and steak because I finally figured out I needed the phophorus cuz my eleyctrolytes were out of balance from the frigging colonic/drinking.cacao fest I had. I love raw foods, but dammit when I want a steak im going to go get one. If I get fat fine. At least ill be alive.